To The Girl Who Never Feels Like Enough

brb crying

Thought Catalog


Hi there,

I know how this must sound. Generic bullshit, right? The same thing said again and again, I get it. I don’t blame the eye rolls. You might shrug this off at first glance, but I know you. You don’t think I see you, but I do.

I’ve seen you all over. I know how you look, how you smell. The sobering look in your eyes when something reminds you of your own unimportance. Your shoulders cave, back bending in ways you were told it never should. You trace your own spine, feeling for each vertebra. You are coming apart, but nobody knows.

You have designed this disguise so that nobody ever sees you crumbling. Who wants that girl? People throw stones at that girl. You’ve seen it happen. You wonder who you even are. Maybe you’ve never known. You are incognito. And I do not blame you…

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Things That I Hate About The Writing/Editing Process

1. There is not a single article online that can make you feel  good about yourself when you are knee-deep in self-dejection.

2. You think that by the 3rd draft you wouldn’t have to rewrite as much.

3. You find out that you do have to rewrite as much/a lot, and you feel like a failure.

5. You wonder if your book will even fit the market by the time it reaches point of submission.

6. Everyone else seems to have it better than you.

7. You don’t want to write anything else.

8. Then you do want to write something else, and you are torn between staying faithful to your manuscript and cheating.

9. You feel like shit for “only” rewriting 2 chapters.

10. You’ve told the story so many times by now, you are completely bored with the events.

11. Your non-writer friends are rolling their eyes at you.

12. Your writer friends “console” you with schadenfreude stories about how they’re a lot more blocked than you.

13. You just want someone to pat your back and tell you that you don’t suck.

14. You write blogposts attempting to make yourself feel better.

15. You search for posts that will make you feel better, even if you’ve already seen #1

16. You are in such a hurry to read this list, you don’t  even notice there isn’t a #4 in it.