Pardon for the cursing, it’s been a really long week (and we’re barely halfway through it already).
I think there is something that we, as a blogging community, could have safely left behind in 2015 – lists. In particular, motivational lists. Yes, I know, they give structure to your writing and make it easier for the reader to skim through it if they’re in a hurry. Let me ask you something: do you want your blog to be something people skim over?
That’s not to say I’m not guilty of doing exactly that, and more times than I care to count, but something occurred to me recently (today, as a matter of fact, while reading a motivational list article) – those things are fucking annoying. How many times can you read tips like “stay organized” and “create flowcharts” and “declutter your drawers for a safer frame of mind” before you want to throw up?
It’s the law of supply and demand. Or maybe the law of being unable to say anything new. Even this article is probably a rip-off from a number of other articles online, but I won’t bother to google them or link them up here because these are my feelings, damn it, I don’t need other people to validate them.
Here’s the problem with lists, or any kind of motivational writing (which, again, I am guilty of) – it sets you up as Someone With Answers (TM) and doesn’t leave much space for you to be imperfect on your blog. High expectations online? There’s no way that could end up backfiring on you. It’s not like depression doesn’t love to latch up to every moment of self-confidence and self-aggrandizing and then use it to beat you into the ground. The more public the better. “Haha,” that old b*tch says, “you think you can tell people on the Internet how to live their lives? Come, read this now. How does it make you feel?”
I think what broke the camel’s back for me today wasn’t general depression suckiness. It was the realization that no matter how easy lists make it look, having your life together is not a simple process. No matter how hard you try to build a support network and make friends and be specific about demands on their time when your mood is in the shits, there is no perfect solution and life isn’t a program that you have to debug.
It’s not a great realization to have. So of course, what better way to fix that than write a blogpost, getting mad at other people?